It has been quite a while since I blogged. Wait, is that really a
word? I think that it is. Anyway, I figured that I should get writing again. On
here at least. Volume one is in the works. But I need to vent a bit. And
writing is the best way.
As many of you know I relocated
up here to Southern Maine in August 2018. I now work for NorDx Labs, part of Maine
Medical Center. It is all like Baystate Health Systems and Baystate Reference
Laboratories down in Western Mass, just on a much smaller scale. There are 1.3
million people in the state of Maine, and 1.3 million people (or more) in
Western Mass alone. I think that should give all a good idea. Anyway, it has its
pros and cons as everything does. I have relearned so much and am so grateful
for that! You all know how much I love what I do. It seems that medical
professions seem to run in my family tree. However, I should get to the
nitty-gritty.
I am sure that several people
out there know how full my Little Grey Cells have been the last thirteen months
of my life. My oldest had a baby with her longtime boyfriend and then he ended
up in jail for ten months due to a rape case that we didn't know existed until
after my daughter was pregnant with little Milo. To cut to the chase, my daughter’s
boyfriend beat the crap out of her, a restraining order was filed, but he still
manipulated her to see him. So she left the baby alone, he was crying,
neighbors called the cops, and my grandson was placed in foster care in
Connecticut (which is where they were living at the time). Even though my
daughter and her boyfriend stated in a meeting with me, my mother, the two of
them and three people from DCF that they wanted Milo up here with me the
Connecticut DCF would not have it. I could go on about how those people lied
through their teeth to us, but that is another blog.
So my grandson is down in
Western Connecticut with his paternal grandparents, and we have to drive four
hours down and four hours back to see him. My daughter and her current
boyfriend who she has known since high school are here and there and
everywhere. They have issues. They tried to start over up here in Maine, ended
up back in Massachusetts for a few weeks, then back to Maine, back to Mass, to
Connecticut and are now back in Massachusetts. Again, trying to document all
the happenings would take me a long time to type. So, I guess that I
should just cut to the chase.
While my daughter and her boyfriend were back in Connecticut they
were bopping from place to place to stay, hanging out at the library and the
shelters and were trying to find jobs. Wednesday night they were walking out
and about (why they were stupid enough to be doing that I have ideas but
seriously don’t want to acknowledge it) they got mugged and both ended up in
the hospital. People found them and called 911. Thank God that there are some
good people left on this Earth. My Mom was on her way down to visit with her
sister, Dad was here with the Psycho-Chihuahua and I was at the lab when my
daughter called Mom. Mom then called me, I called Daddy and to make a long
story short (too late) I had to get an Uber driver to pick them up and drive
them from Torrington Connecticut to Agawam Massachusetts where they have spent
the past few days with my ex’s mother. She and I chatted last night, but when
my daughter called me this morning and told me what was going on down there I
think I had a small farm animal right in the kitchen. It’s a good thing that
both of my parents weren’t here at the time. Just little ole me and the
Psycho-Chihuahua, Then I start getting texts from my (former) M-I-L telling me
that my daughter and her boyfriend can’t stay with her, how they need HELP and
there is nothing that she can do because it ‘costs too much money”. Well, let’s
address that statement shall we?
Last year in 2019 I paid Kia’s rent because she has issues where
she can’t handle being around too many people at one time. That makes holding a
job so difficult for her. So I paid
almost $10,000 in rent and electricity. My parents paid for internet. I paid
for her cell phone. Which she trashed in one of her episodes. It will take me
another eighteen months to pay that sucker off. At least the former M-I-L got
her a new phone, which of course I will need to pay monthly. When the two
Younglings were up for a visit this summer my parents shelled out almost
$4,000.00 in getting them new clothing, shoes and glasses so they could see. I
lost track of how much I gave them from my paychecks when they were here. Why
did we do it all? Because they needed help. Both of them were adopted. They
both have emotional baggage that I don’t think we will ever be able to totally
comprehend. Don’t get me going about how those with mental issues need more
help and more options. I don’t want to get on a political soapbox right now.
What is going to happen tomorrow? I don’t know quite yet. I am so
at a loss. My head hurts. My heart hurts. All of me hurts. I am so blessed to
be here with my parents. We had just started getting things back to normal and
then this fit hits the shan. I’ve pretty much given up on finding “Prince
Charming”. Right now I really could care less in that aspect because I have so
much on my plate. Finally, finally I am seeing a therapist every other week. I
am going to have quite a bit to shell out this coming Wednesday! After all the
BS that happened between November and January things were just starting to get
back to semi-normal. And then this all happens.
Many of you know that I am a Methodist. I will be a Methodist ‘til
I die. A Wesleyan Methodist. Over the last twenty-four hours I have had two
Psalms running through my head on repeat: Psalm 97: 1-7 and Psalm 121. Those
are the two that I recite in my head when I am in this kind of situation. They
bring comfort to my heart, comfort to my soul. And being a PK (Pastor’s Kid)
and sharing a house with a retired pastor isn’t too shabby. But I need to find
peace. I need to calm my head. I can’t stand it when it runs on over-drive like
this. But it does.
So, now that I have cleared out a bit of space in my head I will
go and work on my puzzle. And then make an early Lupper (lunch crossed with
supper) for Mom, Dad and I. We will see what tomorrow shall bring. Thanks to
all who read this blog. I have always
kept my heart very close to me, and closed in some ways. But in the last
eighteen months since I moved “home” I have learned that I can’t keep it closed
in. I need to share all my trials and tribulations, (hey! That’s from “Jesus
Christ Superstar” and I LOVE that musical!). I need to share my successes so
that other people who are walking down the same kind of path that I am know that
we all can prevail. We may not see the light at the end of the tunnel, but it
is there. We just all need to do a Dory; “JUST KEEP SWIMMING.”
